Happy Birthday!!!

Our little Therese is 12 today. She spent her birthday weekend babysitting so I could watch the Princess cheer at her last football home game, going to vounteer at a food pantry, attending another friend's party, (insisting that she did not want to have a party of her own, and would rather have dinner out at her favorite diner and be with "just the family" with a simple home-made cake) and is spending this birthday night attending her first training session for Youth Court.

She is a blessing each and every day.

Another week gone by...

...but fear not, we are still here!

Some technical difficulties around here with a new computer and an additional laptop trying to become part of the family wireless network. New desktop computer: replaces the one we've had since before moving to this middle of nowhere place in December of 2003. Additional laptop:

The Beloved is home!

For 13 days, but hey - a man's gotta have his technology. Which knocked mine off and out for the past 5 days. But we're all back in working order now. At least I think we are. Right before coming home, the Beloved wrenched his already bad back while doing something he won't explain overseas. (More from fear of mockery than for security purposes, I'm guessing). We are four days into our visit, the jetlag is about conquered, but the back pain...not so much. He's on the couch with a heating pad, tramadol, and a grimace on his face if he's not wrangling and/or wrassling with The Boy.

The Princess sailed through her "procedure" last Monday, during which we discovered that she has a lovely, healthy looking set of intestines. The biopsies of the three areas (small intestine, ileum, and colon) will be back next week, but for now, the diagnosis is back in question. So if it isn't Crohn's, colitis, ibs, or celiac issues....what is it?!? Good to know it's better than what we thought, but bad to be guessing one unnecessary appendectomy and a rather humilitating (from a 15 year old's point of view) colonoscopy later. Cheerleading has started so we have decided to do our best Scarlett O'Hara imitation and "think about it tomorrow."

Therese is now an orange belt and steeling her nerves for junior high. And at the school she's going to...that's no small feat. So far, she's learned that two girls (incoming 7th graders) are pregnant. Nice, eh? As she put it, in that straight-faced, matter-of-fact totally Aspie way of hers...."I guess someone forgot to tell them that sex before marriage is a sin." Then she cocked an eyebrow and smirked when we explained to her why we were cracking up. So I'm not entirely sure that was an innocent statement. She has potential, that one...for all good things, but with a teeny-tiny edge of snarkishness. That's to be expected when one grows up at the Casa de Brookside, I s'pose.

On this cool but sunny Sunday afternoon, I am watching the first of the leaves fall from one of our trees out front (I must confess that have no clue what kind of tree it is, but it has tiny little symmetrical leaves that make it look sort of fern-like) and I'm thinking about Fall starting, which, on one hand, is great because I love the weather, the football games, the colors, the smells, the apples and spices that will be cooking in my kitchen in another month or so...but since we didn't get our first truly warm, sunny, and summery-sweltery days until the beginning of August, I feel like we got RIPPED OFF this year!

Hope you've all had a good summer - and yes, Karen, I have more Tales from the Brookside for you. Just a matter of having a few moments to myself to commit them to computer!

Well, now I've done it...

...I've quit my day job as of the end of this year so I can stay home full-time with the Boy and begin planning to - perhaps - homeschool the 11 y/o.

(Remember my prayer request several weeks back?)

No, I have not lost my mind. I will continue to teach an evening class or two each semester, and will take on some "contract work" (i.e., research and drafting for other lawyers) here and there as needed and as may come my way.

My partner in crime and punishment at work is crushed but 100% behind me. Especially because not paying my salary just made his spike!

My mother is freaked. I am officially a "failure" (she equates six-figure incomes with personal success in her children) and apparently I have gone off the "Radical Conservative/Catholic Deep End."

My friends, many of whom thought I was nuts enough for having a baby at 39, are horrified. The last of them just returned to work, all have kids in school and none have kids as young as mine. It's like I've gone in reverse while they are moving forward. I've fallen off a lot of invite lists this past year.

My Beloved has his resolute face on - he will be picking up some of the slack and taking a new, more lucrative job.

My kids are thrilled, especially Little Therese. Since starting middle school this fall, she of the 99 overall average has been called "retarded" (because she gets a 15 minute Aspie respite in a special ed room each day), taught recreational drug vernacular, and propositioned for sex - twice now - in the hallways by 8th grade repeaters, and the special ed handling of her "Aspie social deficit" consists of twice-weekly sessions where she is told to tutor and speak to a severely learning-disabled, behaviorally challenged scatalogically-fixated boy, who she describes as a "human swear word dictionary."

I've had enough. She is too good and pure to be subjected to this crap. So I'm putting an end to it...and to a lot of things my career has allowed us to do, see, purchase, and experience.

Please keep our family in your prayers as we make the adjustment. This was a long, difficult decision making process.

Sarah Palin's Proposals for Special Needs Kids

From the Washington Post - article here. Some of the comments are so brutal.

In addition to her own cute little special needs son Trig, she has an autistic nephew. She may be new at dealing with these issues within her own family, but I think she knows the deal. I really believe she means what she says, would fight hard see her proposals through, and could make a huge contribution by forwarding these causes through obtaining funding increases for research and education.

(PLEASE, Lord...hear our prayers!)

An Aspie's Ode to Stinky Diapers

A burst of new song overheard last night in the living room during a rather malodorous diaper change:

It isn't funny to be stinky
'Cause stinking isn't funny

It doesn't bother you

Because your nose is stuffy

.

And it's not funny to sneeze

When your little nose is runny

Quit rubbing all that snot
On your nekkid tummy

You don't have to smell you
Stop laughing, it's not funny...

Followed by:

"MA-MMMMAAAAA! He's disgusting! I need help!"

After clearing the toxic waste spill, I ran upstairs to write it down before I forgot it. Oh, did I laugh!!!

Happy 11th Birthday!

To our our own Little Flower, she of the Fatima apparitions, who plans to be a midwife and perhaps a nun one day, unless she finds the cure for her personal cross - Asperger's syndrome - which she plans to do in her spare time.

Not by chance, this is also the feast day of St. Luke, patron saint of physicians and surgeons, and author of the most beautiful of the Gospels, imho.

We're having a pizza party, heading out to a scary corn maze/cheerleading fundraiser, then doing cake, ice cream, and presents back here at the Casa de Brookdwellers. More fall fun! Hope you all have a great day, too.

Sickening. Just sickening.

I don't listen to Michael Savage (real last name = Wiener), so I didn't hear him accuse autistic children of being nothing more than brats and their parents for raising them to be "putzes" and "whiners." Chances are you know or know of a family challenged by autism/Asperger's Syndrome. Like me, and my academically brilliant yet socially petrified 10-year-old. Or my friend M and her 16 year old son C, who is afflicted with CP, autism, and a metabolic disorder that requires use of a permanent feeding tube and puree-ing of any food he can ingest orally. He attends school with a 1:1 aide. C will be institutionalized when she and her husband can no longer care for him. My daughter is planning ahead, looking at college catalogues and reading science and anatomy books this summer because she wants to become a midwife so she can "help moms and snuggle newborn babies" for the rest of her life. There's an ocean-wide spectrum in between these two kids, and I thank God every day for the side we're on. I've met and communed with many parents on both legal and personal issues related to this neurological disorder, but have yet to meet a "brat" among their children. So, friends, I ask you to at least consider the following:

Please do not justify this man's commercial existence by listening to him or supporting his sponsors.

Heroes do cool stuff...

...like this - matching autistic kids with service dogs is "magic" - especially when you're coping with life-altering challenges yourself. Awesome.

L.O.FRIGGIN'.L!!!!!

Ahhh, the 10 year old strikes again! She just got up for a late-night drink and walked into my room to find out "what all the howling was about" on tv. The Obama victory speech, I assured her, with a happy crowd cheering.

"Oh. They sound like orcs. Goodnight."

Deadpan delivery, as only an Aspie can do.

(Oh my gosh, I am still laughing!)

[Don't] vote for O[rc]bama!

(Surely someone with Photoshop skills could have fun with these!)

Vaccine/Autism link - not so crazy?

So maybe it's not just our imagination? Former NIH Director gives interesting interview (5 min.) in which she indicates further study is warranted, and that her position has slowly changed with more and more evidence before her. The two test cases are currently before the Court of Federal Claims (before which I am admitted to practice because of this class action, interestingly enough...)

Link to print story here:
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2008/05/12/cbsnews_investigates/main4086809.shtml

Happy Mother's Day!

The Special Mother

by Erma Bombeck

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures and a couple by habit. This year nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of special children.

Did you ever wonder how mothers of special children are chosen? Somehow I visualize God hovering over earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As He observes, He instructs His angels to make notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth; son. Patron saint...give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."

"Forrest, Marjorie; daughter. Patron saint, Cecelia."

"Rutledge, Carrie; twins. Patron saint, Matthew."


Finally He passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a special child."

The angel is curious. "Why this one God? She's so happy."

"Exactly," smiles God, "Could I give a special child to a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."

"But has she patience?" asks the angel.


"I don't want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she'll handle it."

"I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that is so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I'm going to give her has her own world. She has to make her live in her world and that's not going to be easy."

"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."

God smiles, "No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect - she has just enough selfishness."

The angel gasps - "selfishness? is that a virtue?"


God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect. She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a 'spoken word.' She will never consider a step 'ordinary.' When her child says 'Momma' for the first time, she will be present at a miracle, and will know it!"

"I will permit her to see clearly the things I see...ignorance, cruelty, prejudice....and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life, because she is doing My work as surely as if she is here by My side."

"And what about her Patron saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in mid-air.

God smiles, "A mirror will suffice."

To all of you moms out there - present, future, spiritual...

Happy Mother's Day!

Brought to my knees by a 10 year old

A note on our 10 year old whose middle name is Catherine (see right margin for her namesake).

Thorn has very kindly posted over on her blog about what my daughter said to me - and what I consider her role in bringing about our "miracle baby" (see posts below). I started to respond in Thorn's comments about something that happened with her tonight, and I'll expand a bit here.

This one, as many of you know by now, is our "Aspie." Last summer, after 6 years of me knowing something was not quite right (she's off-the-charts brilliant, but socially inept and immature), I finally got the tough-to-take but clear answer that I knew was coming - she has Asperger's Syndrome, which shares many symptoms with, but is not really a true form of, autism. Aspies are generally far more high-functioning than their "autie" counterparts, but they tend to be "square pegs" - essentially, she's your classic really smart but hopelessly nerdy kid.

When she was 2, she had a bad reaction (103-105* fever for 2 days) to "routine" immunizations. Ever since then, whenever she spikes a fever, she smells like metal. Back then I had no idea of any connection between Thimerosal (mercury-based preservative used in vaccines at that time) and autism/Aspergers. We'll save that for another time.

This kid is something else. She is by far the purest and most devout in our family - it just seems to be innate with her. This is why we lovingly tease her and call her our "little Therese." (Nice movie, BTW.) She has these unscripted "moments" (like the Infant of Prague locket and her Fatima apparition reenactments - LOL!) and sometimes she says the most inspired and remarkably wise things...well, it's almost otherworldly. (The next minute she's giggling because someone said "poop." Oh well...)

Just this evening after dinner, my 14 year old said something unusually and uncharacteristically mean to her little sister, which fired me right up. (Yeah, I am a bit overprotective of the one who struggles with social interactions, go figure.) So I sent the offender off to her room, comforted my wounded one, and then started upstairs to go at it one more time with the oldest.

However, my little "Therese" stopped me en route and said "Mamma, it's okay. I've forgiven her. And since I did, you should forgive her too. It's not good for your soul."

As I concluded in my comments to Thorn - I think I know, but I have to ask myself - WHERE does she get this?!?

Honestly, I am not seeking gratuitous back-pats here. Sure, we do our best to instill morals, values, and we lecture our kids about really living their Catholicism, but we aren't exactly floating around on clouds and quoting Scripture or the CCC at them. She takes it to a whole different level - it is truly amazing how her brilliant little mind, even as it is weighted down with her syndrome's tendency toward very literal, concrete thinking, just soars above and beyond our typical family's worldly clouds, toward divinity.