HMD #38 - I'm ba-a-a-a-ack.....

Remember me? Yes, the HeloMom is still without her laptop (a hard business for a late-night, before-bed authoress..my library downstairs is a fishbowl and so darn cold at night!) but a new school year is upon us and there is much to discuss. So I'm sitting downstairs at the desktop because I love...and because I decided to go to cheater Mass at 5 and have some free time on my hands. :)

Anyhoo.....

You'll recall, dear friends, the Beautiful Liar-Beautiful Stranger dilemma. I'll get to that. But first....

Enter the Beautiful Bad Boy.

Our favorite Athlete has gone off to college, a mere 45 minutes away. He still pines. He still loves. When he can think of a good reason, he texts and/or calls. And there are some great reasons - he's made the school's Ultimate Frisbee club (very competitive, apparently), as well as auditioning for slots as the student radio station's sports announcer - got it - and television sports anchor - got the secondary spot. Not bad for a freshman in his first month of school. We are very proud of him, and the Princess is genuinely thrilled at all of these accomplishments. Her tall friend is hitting his stride, has girls throwing themselves at his feet....but his heart is still back here in the middle of nowhere, NY.

Westley is still quietly pitching woo - but the Princess is not catching on. When the Beloved came for a back-to-school visit, he asked for - and received - permission to court the Princess. The catch: the Princess has to say yes. She has skirted the issue, and with good reason. Westley also discussed his plans to enlist in the USMC with the Beloved (who, as some of you may recall, is retired USMC and spent three dreadful years as a recruiter). This has caused the Princess to be quite reluctant to pursue any sort of relationship with Westley, beyond very basic friendship. He is 18, he's darling, he's a good boy from a very conservative Christian family....but.....it's just not clicking. Nevertheless, Westley has stated that he is content to wait and see if she changes her mind. He appeared unexpectedly with flowers and a card because she had a bad back-to-school cold last week after cheering at a chilly football game during a nasty, steady downpour. He came to Friday's home game to sit with me and some other family members, and escorted her safely back to the car. The young man is smitten, and he seems very patient and determined. The Princess' exact words: "he'd be a lot cuter if he wasn't leaving town..."

And now, there's the third player in the saga...the Bad Boy. He is actually not a truly "bad" kid, just very snarky and cocky...and a seriously talented standout football player in his junior year. Another tall, lanky kid who does double duty as a running back and a linebacker. Honor student, has a fraternal twin (who's definitely the "good" twin"), is very popular...but his sarcastic, cutting sense of humor is a bit much for even some of his best friends to handle. Princess has known him since junior high, they were on the same Youth Court team until this year...he was quite put out when she was reassigned and promoted to a judge position last month (ha! hooray!) while he remains a prosecutor, despite having an extra year of experience on the team. He's never given her much thought or a second look. Until now. He looks at her all the time, but (for once) says nothing.

And she's been looking back. Her fellow cheerleaders have noticed - most recently, when she was practicing her new "flying" job this past week and nearly fell/was dropped when the football coach screamed at the Bad Boy by name to get his @$$ back over to the team and away from the girls. She was startled, he was mortified. The next day, the boys finished practice early, but the girls were still at it. She and her base group stayed late to ensure she had the dismounts under control. She was struggling, but then the other girls saw Bad Boy and his cronies watching from the parking lot, told her he was there, turned and faced her towards the parking lot....and suddenly she was making superstar leaps, twists, and graceful landings. Her coach gave her a raised-eyebrow smirk and said she was possibly the biggest cheeseball she'd ever seen. All were laughing.

So what's the hold-up with this kid?!?

As with your typical cocky ultra-popular high school kid who has a crush on a younger, less-popular, but cute-as-heck girl....he's not sure what to do. She's smart. She's pretty. She's a cheerleader. She's a judge as a 10th - not 12th - grader. She sits on all sorts of school and county-wide youth committees where selection is based on merit, not popularity. BUT..... He's friends with a few older brothers of the Princess' tormentors, and has heard all sorts of strange rumors (fabricated and generated by the nasty girls). However, he has also spent enough time in her general vicinity outside of school to question what's been said about her. Yet at the same time...is it worth risking your reputation to give this girl a chance? It's a very "Pretty in Pink" - like scenario. (Except for the blue collar vs. upper-middle class theme... they're on fairly equal footing there.)

After this past weekend's first victory (in which Bad Boy played a major role), the varsity football players and cheerleaders had a bonfire party (dry, for once...). Princess sat on a rock near the fire talking with a few of her teammates. Bad Boy stood directly across the fire pit from her, staring intently...but looked away quickly every time she caught his eye. And then he left without saying a word.

The Princess is petulant, and intends to get to the bottom of this strange behavior. As she put it, "Who the heck does he think he is? Mr. Darcy?"

One can only hope...

HeloMom is not yet equipped to deal equably with a Wickham.

Will report in with any new developments.

HM out.

What I haven't been doing...

I just realized that I have not watched the evening news (or anything, actually) since the Beloved was here back in June for Princess' prom. I turned my bedroom tv on to check the weather for tomorrow (a day without rain?!?) and realized it was tuned to ESPN.

I NEVER watch ESPN unless he's here.

:(

My ONE single day (including Sundays) without 2-4 different kid-related practices, speech therapy, or other things to do was this past Saturday. It poured. We watched Pride & Prejudice (1995...Colin Firth, baby!) all night and I made fabulous blender drinks. The great thing about this new blender is that it has dual blades, so I can make a cold adult beverage on one side and a cold child's beverage on the other. Frozen lemonade with fresh strawberries....and a nice ZING of Grey Goose for the Mamma.

:)

But it would've been great to enjoy it while snuggled up with my Beloved watching ESPN. Or, better yet, watching P&P...

Divine!!!

Helo Mom Dispatch #18 - Chick Flick Pick

The still "unofficial" youngsters [the non-couple that spends every spare moment together in person, texting, or on the phone] are currently in negotiations for Valentine's Day plans.

Athlete would like to take Princess to dine at any restaurant she chooses. She would rather not do this because: 1) she is not allowed to date "Duh, mom, a dinner date is a date!"; 2) she is not allowed to go in a car with a boy unless and until she is old enough to drive herself home [NB: we have offered to relax the transportation rules where the Athlete is concerned because, well, he's uniquely trustworthy...within reason. Read on....]; and 3) that's too "public" for her - they are keeping the extent of their association to themselves and away from the prying eyes and inappropriate comments and innuendoes of their respective senior and freshmen classmates. [How they will manage this after the Big Dance this weekend is anyone's guess, but we'll get to that later...]

So she has suggested that they "order in" and have a private night together, watching romantic movies here at our house. Both sides appealed to me for my input and ultimate verdict - I think it's a splendid plan. Parents, little sister, curious baby, love-seeking dogs and Jack the Lap-cat will all be there to make sure they behave themselves. Athlete wanted to know if there could be an even split - a guy movie and a chick flick. We are working on this, but in the meantime, Princess has been trying to persuade him to watch Pride and Prejudice with her. He was groaning about it, but ready to give in, so I asked (jokingly): "Which one? The 5-hour BBC version or the 2-hour Keira Knightley one?"

Him [suddenly perky]: "There's a 5-hour one?"

Me [somewhat bemused]: "Yeeaahhh...why? Is that a good thing?"

Him [with a decidedly cheeky grin]: "Hmmmm...let's see. I have a choice between spending two or five hours curled up on the couch with your daughter on Valentine's Day. Which one do you think I'm gonna pick?!?"

Helo Mom curses herself for being slow on the uptake, yet cannot help but laugh - this kid is quick on his size 16 feet, and just too darn cute for his own good.

Helo Mom 102

11-5-08 Helo Mom Update:

On November 4, 2008, America elected its first black president, and my daughter got asked out on her first date.

She said no based on parental advice and age concerns, but has not excluded the possibility of having him come over to meet the parents and be interrogated accordingly. He asked what sports teams the Beloved likes, whether he hunts and fishes....smart kid.

Lovestory

Click on the link above to watch the Cheerleader's new favorite song/video. This absolutely nails it. It is exactly how I picture her romantic little 14-year-old, Jane-Austen-loving mind at work...

I can't tell you what the 18 year old Football Player's mind is thinking. Pretty sure this isn't it, however.

Is it any wonder that her parents are a pair of trainwrecks?

Oh yeah - today's revelation: his after school job? Lifeguard. Problem? My daughter has had a starry-eyed lifeguard crush thing going on since she was 2. Every single session of swimming lessons back in CA, there was some 18 year old Adonis lugging her around, and they loved her as much as she loved them. A favorite quote from the tall blonde reincarnated Viking surfer god from the summer of 2000: "Your little heartbreaker is an excellent swimmer - I will miss having her in my class, but she's ready to move up to [whatever the next level was] with Jen."

I am torn between running to the kitchen to gulp down a large glass of wine or perhaps agonizing over tea and chocolates. Update: I resorted to all 3

Cranford

It arrived Wednesday, we watched the whole 5 hours yesterday, and I highly recommend it - especially on a rainy AND sick day. :)
There's a panoply of Britain's best actors, all of whom turn in excellent performances. It's more than just a period piece - beneath the Jane Austen-emulating plots of Elizabeth Gaskell (who wrote her novels starting about 40 years post-Jane), there's some serious examination of the coming Industrial Revolution (North and South did that best) and the decline of the rigid class system that came along with it. She did, after all, have her serial pieces published by her mentor, Charles Dickens...
Oh, and guys, my very manly beloved laughed out loud at various points. He was on the couch under blankies and under the influence of Theraflu, true, but he was a trooper and watched most of it with us girls. As he puts it, "it's always good to study the enemy and get to know how their minds work."

Cinematical sick days

Here's what we've watched so far (in case it is not clear from what follows, the 14 year old is sick, too) since the plague struck on Saturday:

1. Atonement. Heard great things, was told I'd love it, right up my alley, etc., so I bought it without reading anything spoilerish.

SUCKED.

Note to self and others: the "happiest person" does not like getting her guts kicked in at the movies especially when at home with a fever and sore throat.

MAJOR SUCKFESTIVAL after the first 15-20 minutes, and use of the dreaded c-word came needlessly and outta nowhere, horrifying all of us. Our Little Therese came in to say goodnight at just the wrong moment - she has no idea what "it" is, but knew by our shock and collective gasps that it was the worst of the worst and so she was outta there for the duration. We are not gilded lilies by any stretch (case-in-point: same word used in Bridget Jones, which we loved despite ourselves, made us laugh out loud in shock), but this was just not a necessary device - other such descriptive words would have made the same point.

2. The Tenant of Wildfell Hall. Let's face it, it's a lesser Bronte novel. You know it's gonna tend toward the gothic, and that's fine. Overall, had some longish periods of SUCK, but it turned out right at the end.

3. North and South (BBC Elizabeth Gaskell adaptation, not the John Jakes saga).

LOVE. This is a sick-day staple, all 5 hours of it or whatever. LOVE.

4. Sense and Sensibility. (Emma Thompson/Kate Winslett/Hugh Grant)

LOVE LOTS. Unbelievably, we've had this on VHS forever and the kid had not seen it, or didn't remember it. I laughed watching her cry. :)

5. Pride & Prejudice. BBC and Kiera Knightley/Matthew MacFadyen versions. Again, sick staples. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!!! (Even the new one, despite its many Austen-canon departures).

6. The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe. GOOD. Getting everyone ready to see Prince Caspian.

Finally....if any men are left reading this....the beloved was struck down in the night, too, so to appease him this morning:

7. Tombstone. Oh yeah.

"I'm yuh Huckleberry..." <-- Still not quite sure what that means,* but LOVE this one. Lots. 14 year old was a bit queasy over all the blood and gore (she was forewarned), 10 year old at school, baby laying down on floor in the next room surrounded by toys, covered in snot and a box of kleenex he managed to savage while no one was looking...Daddy in the grips of Theraflu and fever croaking out his approval of every single thing Val Kilmer and Kurt Russell said and did....AWESOME.


Now I must go make the tea and see if our latest movie-miniseries kill, Cranford, has arrived...


*UPDATE: Ok, I had to know, so here's the explanation from "World Wide Words":

To be one’s huckleberry — usually as the phrase "I’m your huckleberry" — is to be just the right person for a given job, or a willing executor of some commission.

Ohhhhhh yeah. Val Kilmer was just the right person for that role. LOVE LOVE LOVED him in this one!!!

Jane alert!

Starting January 13th, PBS' Masterpiece Theatre will begin showing adaptations of each of her major novels, plus a biography special...always good girl-night fodder at our house.

I have been a Jane Austen fan since reading Sense & Sensibility the summer after 7th grade, way before it was "cool" (i.e., a good 15 years before Colin Firth came out of that pond in his wet shirt...). Not a rabid JASNA member, Jane-ite or vitriolic scholar type, just an ardent admirer. I have read everything there is -- Juvenilia, letters, biographies, etc., and of course have watched the numerous adaptations of each novel. Her work was/is to me what JK Rowling's is to this generation, I suppose. I keep a copy of Pride & Prejudice in my nightstand, as my 35 year old Steiff teddy bear is a bit more fragile (she's on top of the armoire keeping an eye on me from afar, however). Call it my literary blankie.