THE NOBEL PEACE PRIZE???

ARE YOU [EXPLETIVE] KIDDING ME?!?

Between this and Al Gore, my theory that a peace prize given in the name of the inventor of dynamite is no longer ironic...it's friggin' ridiculous.

Bono deserved it more than either of these two clowns.

Trying to "open up dialogue with the Muslim world?" Has that been helpful? That's up there with the dress Michelle Obama wore to the CMOH ceremony for Sgt. Jared Monti a few weeks back in the ridiculous, inappropriate, and farce categories.

Wow. Just.....wow.

HMD#32 - Gut Wrenching...

...and I mean that literally! Yes, the Athlete was feeling ill last night, physician father told him to suck it up and go to bed....and so once he started throwing up, dad relented and Athlete went into the ER this morning, complaining of severe pain on the right side.

He had his appendix out this afternoon.

Prom is Saturday.

He swears he will be at the prom, no matter what. Princess vows that she will not go with him if he's violating the surgeon's orders.

We are all in uproar.

HeloMom out.

Fresh from painting the kitchen...

A conundrum for us all to ponder from the "is it me?" category...

Let's take a trip to Theoretical Island, and let's say you're a teacher in a quasi-Catholic school system. Your kid goes to junior prom, then has a bunch of friends over afterwards to hang out in your house/back yard to build a fire and "make s'mores."

Do you:

A. Say no, because it's late, it's prom night, and you never know with kids these days....

B. Say yes, and discreetly monitor the activities to ensure nothing untoward is going on

C. Join in the festivities and provide the alcohol to the 16-18 year olds as well as the graham crackers, marshmallows, and Hershey bars; or

D. Go to bed and tell the kids to have fun while a few dozen teenagers are at your house on prom night, and then feign shock when the cops are beating on your door and arresting drunken teenagers who are rampaging through the neighborhood on 4-wheelers you own and holding beer they got from your fridge?

Okay. Stick with me.

Let's presume, for the sake of argument, that you chose C and/or D.

Should you still be employed by the local (marginally) Catholic Diocesan school system, or perhaps at least be on leave until the investigation is complete and the charges are either proven or dropped?

IS IT JUST ME WHO THINKS SOMETHING'S ROTTEN IN DENMARK?!?

Fr. Corapi on Obama at Notre Dame

H/T: Dearest Thorn

Helo Mom's Deep Thought of the day...dispatch #27

...as I said to one of my college friends who tracked me down on Facebook:


"Simple Minds....simpler times."

This was my summation after a long discussion about the upcoming Prom experience.


I sat with another mom at a track meet yesterday and got an earful about what will happen before, during, and after the Prom. The expenses, the expectations, the resort, the limos, the $500 dresses, Armani tuxes, the coed sleepover keg parties that all the "cool" kids have (courtesy of their parents) at various lake houses and hotels owned, rented, and handed over to minors by these consenting adults....

I like this lady quite a bit, so I was stunned when she sat there blithely talking on and on about all of these extravagances as though it were no big deal, it's part of the experience, rite of passage, etc. My jaw was scraping the bleachers and she just laughed at me for being naive about the whole thing. You can call me a lot of things. A Pollyanna ain't one of 'em, however. It just irks me.

What happened to a night at the local banquet hall with a dj, a decent but not haute couture gown, a questionably fitted powder blue rental tux, borrowing Dad's car, and not having sex as a matter of [inter]course before showing up back at home sometime 12-24 hours after the dance ends?

Not that I was a saint by any stretch back in the day, but c'mon! I went to a big suburban high school in a fairly upscale area, and many of us came from well-to-do backgrounds and yet...we worked for and bought (and the more artistic types even made) our own dresses and got our dance tickets with our own money. Limos were an extravagant exception - not a "norm" - and whatever underaged drinking (and more) went on was generally NOT with our parents' blessing. (We had older siblings who came in handy for buying the booze.)

Helllloooooo....PARENTS!?! Maybe instead of enabling and encouraging all this narcissistic, hedonistic behavior, you could be, oh...I dunno, PARENTS...and say no or set some limits for your little darlings? Not that it necessarily worked on us 20+ years ago, but instead of signing on for all of it like this mom did, it stuns me that there is no desire to TRY to be the moral compass for these kids. Being the "cool mom" who spits out $20's like an ATM machine for all this nonsense is so much better.

Thank God my Princess and her teetotalling Athlete are adorable but nerdy not-so-cool kids who plan to be home at 12:30. Seriously. I don't care if they crash out on the couch watching chick flicks or ESPN all night or if he drops her at the door and dashes home, but there's been no question of how the night will go. The kid told me the itinerary, when the dance ends, how far it is from home, and what time they will get back here. The dance is 5 weeks away, and he's got it all planned out without my having had to ask.

Now if we could just find "the" dress.....

Judas...

Here's your first DNC contribution...

Moving Day - or - Why People Suck, Part 2-Gazillion

So last night I'm driving up our street, which is one of the main roads in town (actually the old "river road" that goes back to Colonial days), Princess and I are chatting away when suddenly, nay mercifully, I see a flash out of the corner of my eye and slam onthe brakes. Here's why:

This sweet little boy ran across the road and damn-near under my tires. There were more cars coming, no time to get out, so I opened the door and said "C'mon puppy!" He hesitated for less than a second and came flying into my lap, trembling. I checked - he had a collar that had obviously been his for awhile, but no tags, no phone number written on the fabric of the collar, nothing.

We were less than a block from home, where the traffic dies out a little, so we went home, gave him a snack and some water, and then took him for a walk up and down the street hoping someone would be looking for him.

No luck.

So I called the local animal hotline, nobody there 'til Tuesday. (Budget cuts, dontcha know.) Called the non-emergency police and fire number, and they said I'd have to turn him loose or hang on to him until the shelter opens. Called the local SPCA (they will scan strays for chips) but they are also out until Tuesday. So we had an overnight guest. This is the sweetest little poodle-y guy...timid but clearly eager to please, and also flat-out terrified and panicked between the near-death-by-car encounter and being 'jacked by unfamiliar humans.

When we gave up looking for a bereft owner, we came home and soothed him. He climbed into the Princess' lap and after he stopped quivering, he passed out. He ended up sleeping with Therese, first in a nest she made from an old blankie, but somewhere in the night he hopped up into her bed and snuggled under the covers with her. When she got up for school, his head was on her spare pillow. This is a doggie who was loved and who loved his people. So what happened? How could such a gentle and nice little guy be out and about with no id and no one looking for him?

Easy. It's the last weekend of the month. Moving weekend. In our old town, there are lots of big old, historical houses - some on our road going back centuries to the Colonial era, followed by the ubiquitous Victorians, Cape Cods, Prairie, Four-Squares, Craftsmen, horrid 50's-70's split-level ranches....you name it, you can see the styles grow "younger" as you head further out from the center of town. (Ours is a Roaring 20's wealthy banker-real estate mogul's house, so we're on the edge of the city/township line). Many of these older houses have subsequently been divided up into apartments, indeed some were originally built to be boarding houses. (There are still original cement and iron hitching posts and mounting blocks in the front yards!)

Anyway, the last weekend of the month is when people move out of and into these dismal half and quarter-house apartments. Cats and dogs are thrown out like so many broken lamps and particle board entertainment centers...and left to fend for themselves. I have no doubt that this poor little dog suffered that same fate - he was decently but not recently groomed, hungry, thirsty, and way out of his element. No pets allowed at the next place? Sorry Curly, you're on your own. But what if I'm wrong? I can't (and really shouldn't) just take in a dog from the street - what if his owner really didn't take his tags off the collar and turn him loose?

I called a friend at the police department to ask what I should do - he sent an Animal Control officerette to pick up "Curly" for a 72-hour hold on the off-chance that someone cares enough to look for him. They will call me before making any more "final" decisions about what to do with him.

Well, friends...what do you think I should do? The Golden Retard and Labradork didn't seem to mind him once the ritual butt-sniffing and eyeballing took place....although Jack was not amused in the least. I think he was actually marking his jugular and other vulnerabilities so he could take him out if needed. They are roughly the same size and weight.

It's a cat-eat-dog world, after all.

.

Darn right, says Jack....

Monetize?

Blogger wants us to "monetize" our blogs by cluttering them up with their advertisers, so they added a friggin' tab for that?

Ridiculous.

Just sayin'.

"You must die to live"

That's what the Gospel said today, right? The grain of wheat falls to the ground so that new life might spring up. Christ died so that we might share in eternal life.

So I'm taking those words and applying them to my spiritual life here in the DOR, and trying to draw comfort from them in the face of this:

Behold Bishop Matthew Clark's new vinyl labyrinth prayer mat in Rochester's Sacred Heart Cathdral!

And then there's this tasty treat:

Two words: REIKI MASS

[CORRECTION: Per the Sagacious Dr. K, the above took place in Cinicinnati, but see combox for more detail and links to DOR-specific pics... ]

Go on over to Rich's blog, Ten Reasons (from whence I swiped these photos), and scroll through the posts and better yet, the comments.

The death of Catholicism this Diocese (its murder, really) is a tragedy - thousands upon thousands of lost souls, and thousands more misguided and lied to by the liberal snake oil being sold to them each Sunday at travesties like this. The few brave souls who stand up for the Faith are ostracized, marginalized, and branded as crazies and/or troublemakers.

But I say we crazy troublemakers are the wheat, and in a little over three years, when the detritus is cleared and the current Bishop decamps for parts (hopefully) unknown, we will grow...and the splendor of Tradition and Truth will return.

St. John Fisher, Pray for Us!

They Walk Among Us

I wonder why the FLDS compounds get all the press while this city-compound and others of its ilk are apparently so numerous ("hundreds"), yet relegated to the obscure sections of the news...not that I'm a fan of the FLDS, but you know what I'm sayin'.

HeloMom Dispatch #23 - A Psalm's Answer to a Sick and Crazy World

How appropriate that we should be at #23 for this one...

Well, so much for getting back to normal. After a week off from school, the Princess went back to school, overdid things, and has been experiencing additional abdominal pain. So we took Friday off and went back in to the hospital for outpatient testing to ensure all is sound and healing properly. No bad news from that yet, so we will assume all is well.

In the meantime, the Princess noted some tension and much smirking and snarking from her classmates when she returned (yes - the same little pack of snots who've been horrible to her since jr. high) and the Athlete noticed some strange behavior among his set as well. It all finally made sense on Thursday...one girl asked the Princess if she was going to be able to return to gym due to her "delicate condition" and another chimed in that no, she'd be recovered soon, and didn't she look like she'd actually lost weight due to her "procedure." Princess didn't put it all together until she was sitting alone on a crowded bus and pondering it all on her way home. A girl in hysterics burst through the door and related all of the details. Then she got sick.

Later that evening, the Athlete was asked about "the rumor" by his physician father, who'd been told outside of the school environment that something unkind was circulating about the Princess at school - more specifically, that she'd had something other than her appendix removed. Fortunately, he knows his son as well as I know my daughter (and really, you can't get pregnant by kissing each other goodnight with mom right there...), and no one who knows either of them well lends any credence to such nonsense. But try telling that to a 15 year old mortified Princess and a now-feral Athlete whose Princess' good name (and his by implication) has been besmirched by a group of vicious, nasty, jealous little [bad word]s for no purpose other than to hurt and damage two nice kids whose lives are centered around living out the kind of goodness and virtue that such maladjusted creatures cannot understand. He's very, very angry and ready to "throw down" if anyone dares speak it aloud.

So this weekend has revolved around soothing the wounded pair and coming up with strategies to get through it. It will all blow over, they will emerge unscathed, those who know them will laugh it off, and those detractors who persist will demonstrate their own foolishness to others. (I will spare you a recounting of the inner thought processes and utter rage that HeloMom has experienced these past few days...)

And yes, I had a chat with one of the school administrators on Friday . For all the good it did, which was not much. The Athlete was in the office raising hell and I was on speaker phone with a silently weeping Princess in the background trying to come up with a solution. There isn't one when you're dealing with teenaged girls. Pulling the rumormongerers from class (this was the school's suggestion) and engaging in the accusation/denial ritual will not cure the problem or make life easier for Princess. In fact, it is like throwing gas on a fire and things will escalate. Plus it's a matter of giving legs to the rumor and making it more talked-about, more widely. I think the Athlete and Princess need to deal with it under the radar by starting a counterintellgence campaign among their peers and that will be more effective than anything the adults can do at the school level. Fortunately, the little pack of 9th grade girls who seem to have started it are not well-liked by anyone...save themselves. It will die down, and they will been seen for what they are.

The one thing that struck me most about the administrator's reaction to it all was the utter lack of understanding that it is NOT simply a matter of gossip and slander - she's put up with that crap from this group for awhile now. But to a minority-opinion-having, ardently prolife girl, this is the lowest and most disgusting sort of rumor imagineable. I had to explain more than once that it assaulted her character, sure, but worse, it violated her core beliefs and her dignity. And given the flak she's taken for voicing her feelings about abortion, about the presidential campaign (remember the inauguration letter flap?), and even the teasing about her purity ring, who can blame her for never wanting to set foot in the place again? We're past that now, and she's ready to return and fight back tomorrow.

But what a thing for anyone's child to go through. As I told the young couple, the devil never seems to relent, especially when you do your best to live out your goodness and principles for others to see. Don't give in to the anger and despair, and hold your heads high.

St. Michael, pray for us. (And yeah, I'm thinking it's high time for some Old Testament smiting on the evildoers. Is that so wrong?)

Helo Mom is not a fan of the meds, but a little Xanax might have been nice these past few days. But in the absence of that, there's this:

PSALM 23 v 22

The Good Shepherd

Psalm Of David

1 Yahweh is my shepherd,
I lack nothing.

2 In meadows of green grass he lets me lie.
To the waters of repose he leads me;

3 there he revives my soul.
He guides me by paths of virtue
for the sake of his name.

4 Though I pass through a gloomy valley,
I fear no harm;
beside me your rod and your staff
are there, to hearten me.

5 You prepare a table before me
under the eyes of my enemies;
you anoint my head with oil,
my cup brims over.

6 Ah, how goodness and kindness pursue me,
every day of my life;
my home, the house of Yahweh,
as long as I live!

(From my Jerusalem Bible, 1966 ed. )

Novel idea...

If you want to portray your religion as "one of peace" well...this might not be the best way to go about it.

Prominent Orchard Park Man Beheads Wife

Just sayin'.

Why not?

Who better to give your first official interview as President of the United States to than Al-Arabiya?

Let's spread the love like we're gonna spread the wealth!

Some notable quotes:

What I told [Sen. George Mitchell] is start by listening, because all too often the United States starts by dictating

Yeah, I was listening when my husband called to tell me to flip on the tv on 9-11-01. The sound of the second plane hitting the WTC is something I'll never forget, Mr. President.

My job to the Muslim world is to communicate that Americans are not your enemy

See above. Yeah. We weren't Japan's enemy either, but that didn't stop them from bombing the sh*t outta Pearl Harbor. Note to to the Chief Executive: THEY DON'T LIKE US NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU LIKE THEM!

and then there's this:

[He also noted that he has Muslim relatives]

Hey Barry - say hi to Uncle Achmed for me...

St. Michael the Archangel, pray for us.

Day One of America's Gethsemane

So when I finally flipped on the tv last night, this is the first thing I saw on FoxNews - I managed to find it online so I could share it with you, dear friends and readers...

"Desperate" times indeed...Dana Delaney, may God forgive you.

Then this morning, as I attempted to arise from my flu-induced stupor, the Beloved shows me this .

Save the killers, kill the babies.

Stop the ride, I wanna get off.

When It's OK To Fail

FINAL UPDATE: My daughter's letter was NOT published (shocker). There will be a shortened lass schedule tomorrow because the student body is - yes - required to watch the inauguration.

Semester exams start next week. Just sayin'.

UPDATE #2: Got a less than apologetic reply from the teacher this morning, which I will paraphrase here: the assignment was apparently given in response to a contest in the local paper, and the nun-in-chief had the English teachers assign it to the students on Monday. It was NOT optional, and indeed, no alternative assignment was given. The teacher states that the contest gave writers the task of writing a letter "detailing" what The One's policies and goals should be, or drafting the first 250 words of his inaugural address, and he indicates that the words "congratulate" and "positive" were not in the contest rules. He advised students that submissions were, however, supposed to be "appropriate for publication."

I am looking in the newspaper's online archives for the contest details to confirm this, but in the meantime, one must ask: What exactly is "appropriate for publication" in a left-wing newspaper is supposed to mean? Was this left open to interpretation by high school English students? When they are told to "behave appropriately," is it not implied to the child that their behavior must be "good" or "positive" behavior? Could it be that the teacher is blaming the kid for interpreting the intent of the assignment rather than accepting that it was an ill-conceived assignment?

Here's a direct quote:

...when I am made aware of legitimate concerns, I always try to accommodate those requests.

Hmmmm....perhaps my concern is not regarded as "legitimate" depending on how you interpret that last bit. See the problem?

I'm not done with this.

UPDATE: Sent a written request for clarification of the assignment requirements to the teacher a few hours ago...no response yet...

My eldest, the quasi-Catholic high school student, has received the following mandatory Honors English assignment:

Write a letter to President-Elect Obama congratulating him on his inauguration. It must be positive, and not exceed 250 words.

[yep - it's a RED ZONE moment]

The letters must be emailed by the students to the local paper and to the teacher.

Yeah. I have a slew of MAJOR ISSUES with this assignment. I told her she did not have to do the assignment if she did not want to, and that I'd go to the mat for her with the teacher and the administration...including the habitless nuns...about the lack of 1st amendment rights involved when one is required to support One who she knows to be an insupportable politician. She did not want to go that route because the implicit threat involved getting a failing grade if you went "negative," and that was something she didn't want to deal with.

We conferred until late into the evening last night about how to be "positive" and yet make a stand against what's wrong about The One at the same time. We discussed the issues, she drafted, and I helped her pare it down to the required limit. (I suggested that she write a thank you letter to President Bush for his service and especially for keeping the country safe from enemies foreign and domestic during his tenure and hand it in along with the required letter for extra credit...but we agreed that might not go over well...)

I doubt the letter she wrote will be published (I'll post it later in that case), and I hope she won't be punished for having the audacity to hope in her letter that The One will stick to his vow to protect women's rights...including those of unborn women. ("FOCA" that!)

If she is penalized in any way, it's game on - and make no mistake, I will scorch some serious earth if I have to.

I try to be a reasonable person, I really do. I have been trained to look at issues from both sides, and I strive to do so in my professional life even when a counterargument is just patently nonsensical. As I have been taught, and as I now teach others, sometimes you have to set aside your own feelings and take a step back...because you must be able to understand the opposition in order to defeat it. But today, I just can't do it. I cannot comprehend the goose-stepping mentality the Obamaniacs have...and the fact that said mentality has infiltrated a Catholic High School where I'm paying (a lot) for viral immorality to be downloaded into my child's head, well, it sickens me.

Minnesota, WHAT have you done?

Al Franken? Seriously?

Senator Stuart Smalley

I'm corrupt enough, I'm dumb enough, and doggone it, people hate me.

I am absolutely sick to my stomach. As far as I'm concerned, Jesse Ventura was mere child's play compared to this dangerous, politically inept, morally vacant, tax-evading, poor excuse for a man.

Christmas in the Red Zone

Any of you who have been reading this blog for the past year or so have probably figured out that I am generally good-natured. But reading something like this sends me into that rare place...the Red Zone.

WTF ARE THESE PEOPLE THINKING? MICHELLE OBAMA, THE PRO-ABORT PRINCESS AS A STATUARY STAND-IN FOR OUR MOST BLESSED MOTHER? BARRY AS ST. JOSEPH, THE ULTIMATE MAN AND PERSONIFICATION OF SELFLESSNESS AND GUARDIAN OF THE MOST PRECIOUS LIFE EVER BORN UNTO THIS EARTH? OR AS A "WISE" MAN? DON'T GET ME STARTED....OH WAIT, I AM STARTED!!!!

The fact that I am in my ragey place in connection with Christmas seems sacrilegious. We are waiting for the Light of the World to arrive on the Feast of the Incarnation. Are there any brave priests or Bishops in Napoli who can stand up and protest this sickness?

I can't imagine that any Catholic of good conscience (not to mention taste) could possibly think this is a good idea, or that any amount of money is worth displaying this travesty in their stores. Not when your soul is at stake.

Why, after all this time, am I still capable of being shocked at the depravity of human nature....

Eating Raul

Well, eating out of his hand, anyway - apparently that's what we can look forward to after The One takes office and undoes a half-century of US foreign policy regarding Cuba.

Maybe he'll announce the end to the embargo while picnicking on the beach with all of the newly-freed Gitmo detainess and the Castro brothers.

Wait! I know...they can call it a "Bay of Pigs Roast" and he can help light the fire to help them burn the past 8 American presidents in effigy.

Then he can head south on his American Downfall/New World Order Tour to hang out with his good buddy "Hurricane" Hugo Chavez.

Black Friday Indeed

This story just absolutely sickens me.

Wal-Mart worker killed in Black Friday stampede

Is a friggin' flatscreen or GPS for your car worth doing this to someone?

I have never, ever shopped on "Black Friday" because the display of unbridled greed, materialism, and sickness of the human condition and culture in this country is too much to bear.

Lord have mercy on us all.

Helo Mom 101

11-4-08 Helo Mom Update:

He walked her to her last class, thereby making himself tardy for his own. They talked for 2 hours on the phone last night. Other senior football player boys, who have never taken note of her existence, are suddenly greeting her and being nice to her at school.

Good grief.

The Beloved (who, thankfully, was at work chasing wildlife and tackling an elderly woman who tried to take an unloaded .357 in her luggage last night) has a bulge-y looking vein at one temple, and has refused to allow the poor boy to come over to our house. Ever. Or at least until after they're both out of college.

He has, however, offered to take him hunting. Or fishing. Without witnesses. Very soon.

11-3-08 Helicopter Mom Update:

I am truly not ready for this. I have just discovered and am willing to admit that I lack the requisite maturity and self control to deal with boys courting my daughters. The Football Player promised to call the Cheerleader yesterday, but did not do so until the late evening. She was on pins and needles all day, checking the phone lines, cell phone ring volume, wondering if she'd said something wrong the night before, etc., so we all had to be on pins and needles too, and NO ONE was allowed to say anything about it. The Beloved was exhibiting signs of barely controlled warrior rage - he is extremely unhappy with the entire situation based simply on age. I was ready to kill the kid myself (he's got a full foot on me at 6'5", but I think I could take him) after watching our girl agonizing in silence, but then he called after getting home from work - he's spent the month of October volunteering at a Halloween haunted house/fundraiser for foster kids programs, and last night was the end of it. He really is a good kid. On the other hand, I - someone who you'd normally perceive as being a fairly well-adjusted, intelligent, and slightly amusing 40 year old woman - am a neurotic freak of a mother. This was just ONE DAY. The first of many to come. Lord, give me strength.

Okay. The Cheerleader Princess - a freshman - is being pursued by a Football Player senior. He is a nice kid, nerdy, not at all the "bad boy" type.

But he's a senior.

She's a freshman. A cute, smart, funny, but completely inexperienced, never-been-kissed, got her first-ever phone call from a boy today FRESHMAN.

I am not ready for this. Suggestions?